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Aardvark Daily

New Zealand's longest-running online daily news and commentary publication, now in its 25th year. The opinion pieces presented here are not purported to be fact but reasonable effort is made to ensure accuracy.

Content copyright © 1995 - 2019 to Bruce Simpson (aka Aardvark), the logo was kindly created for Aardvark Daily by the folks at aardvark.co.uk



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That is it, I slit my wrists

30 April 2021

What an evil sod I am.

Because of me, entire races have been disadvantaged, exploited, oppressed and had their beliefs, history and cultures suppressed.

Thanks to my unwillingness to make ammends for the sins of my forefathers, I am unworthy and should in turn be punished for those sins, perhaps by way of "cancellation" or worse.

My "privilege" comes at such a huge price for so many others that I can not bear the thought of the harm and hurt that my mere existence produces.

My inability to fluently speak a language that had no written form until the arrival of my forefathers condemns me to a position of cultural ignorance and untrustworthiness.

Such is the state of the 21st century.

How can I continue to claim a right to the oxygen so sorely needed by others, as the world becomes a runaway furnace of climate change, thanks to my excessive use of fossil fuels throughout my 68 years on the planet?

As someone who identifies only as a hetrosexual male, how can I show my face in a rainbow coloured world where gender is increasingly as fluid as the beer I drink?

How dare I remember, even for a moment, the figureheads of history that I was taught about at school, when I now know how evil they were, with their slave-trading ways and their penchant for annexing other civilisations and races in the name of colonisation?

It is surely only a matter of time before my cheery "hi, how are you?" to some nice woman I meet on the street is considered a sexual advance of which I should be forever ashamed?

Every time I am turned away when trying to collect an over-sized mail item from the Post Office because I forgot to bring photo ID (but I have the keys to my PO Box in hand) I should feel ashamed that I have even attempted such a dastardly deed. Likewise if I try to make an over-the-counter transaction at my local bank without ID, even though I have my debit-card and PIN with me.

And soon, I won't even be legally allowed to fly my toys, unless I register on a list of offenders and meticulously supply the details of all those toys to the government -- because they fear such things and simply by having them, I must surely be a very, very bad man.

In other words... what the Fk has the world become these days?

Unfortunately, I am becoming a less and less suitable fit for the world as it increasingly tries to insert its own head up its own backside. A world where we deny our history, require constant repentance and apology from the innocent, suspect everyone of being evil and about to commit bad deeds -- that's not a world I would choose to live in.

However, fear not dear readers -- I am not in some deep depressed state and considering taking my own life. Hell no!

Fighting is great exercise and I shall stand firm and true to my own principles for as long as I am breathing.

I regard everyone as equals, even though we've been told that due to our "white privilege" we are inferior to other races.

I regard all genders as equal and acknowledge that people have a right to identify as whatever gender they choose -- even though their actual sex remains immutable.

I forgive those who believe that my every move is based on evil intent and therefore constantly require me to prove my identity and innocence. They are so vapid and weak of mind that they clearly can not think for themselves and should thus be pittied.

The world is what *we* make it and I will continue to make my world what I believe is best for me. If that inconveniences or outrages some then so be it. I really don't give a rat's arse about that.

Ah.. that was cathartic and rounds off both the week and the month of April very nicely.

Thank you for your indulgence.

Did I touch any nerves or press any buttons with that little rant?

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